Word on the political grapevine today is that Malcolm Turnbull has taken his ball and gone home, leaving the other Liberals with no game to play. Andrew Bolt and Alan Jones have responded with calls for a dacking.
NBN Threatened By Lack Of Morse Telegraphers
An update on NBN Co’s 2013 strategic implementation review has revealed that the Liberals’ cheaper version of the NBN may be at risk due to, amongst other things, a lack of Morse Code telegraphers.
Did Joe Hockey Travel Back in Time to Silence Himself?
Stunning revelations today as it seems now that Joe Hockey somehow managed to travel back in time in order to silence himself. Only days after embarrassing footage of Hockey campaigning for free education at a 1987 protest emerged, all evidence of this footage has now vanished.
Abbott Denies Presence of Climate Change Elephant
Prime Minister Tony Abbott has denied that there will be any elephants present for his upcoming talks with US President Barack Obama. “I hear all this drivel about how there’s going to be a climate change elephant in the room when Mr Obama and I meet, and it’s just not on the cards.”
Abbott Renames Office “Minister For Chicks”
As part of a broad restructuring move, Prime Minister Tony Abbott announced today that the office of Minister for Women will now be known as Minister for Chicks. “It’s shorter, it’s catchier, and I think it better reflects this government’s progressive and enlightened approach to dealing with womens issues.”
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