Tony Abbott has raised his personal Threat Level to “Alright Looking” following the news that he would be touring a factory at which, rumour had it, a woman was employed.
Abbott Renames Office “Minister For Chicks”
As part of a broad restructuring move, Prime Minister Tony Abbott announced today that the office of Minister for Women will now be known as Minister for Chicks. “It’s shorter, it’s catchier, and I think it better reflects this government’s progressive and enlightened approach to dealing with womens issues.”
Frances Abbott Pony May Have Been Gift
Controversy has erupted surrounding the pony obtained by Frances Abbott during her time at the Whitehouse Institute of Design. The Institute claims that they had no knowledge of any ponies, and indeed would have had trouble telling a pony from a horse unless the two were standing right next to each other.